You might be wondering (and worried) about how to tell people about your divorce. The short answer to this question is…however the hell you want. It’s entirely up to you to decide how, when, and even if, you tell people that you’re divorced.
Like any other major life transition, it might be hard to talk about at first. Take your time and practice saying it by yourself, in your car, in front of a mirror. Hear it and try phrasing it in different ways. If you’re looking for a few other suggestions, we’ve collected some interesting ones below.
Ways to announce your divorce…
Do it like the A-listers. Ever notice that there seems to be a playbook of what to say when celebs announce their divorces? It’s rarely veered from and acts like a formula that others can follow. But most importantly, the couple writes it together (supposedly) and then shares it publicly together. You can work with your ex to compose a statement that you both feel comfortable posting to social media channels. What you say in the privacy of your home, or to your friends, can be something else entirely.
Slowly. You can send a blast email announcement if that’s your style. My divorce happened at an earlier and more innocent time, pre-social media, which means that I took a different approach. I made a list of the people I wanted to tell and then I sent them divorce cards. In the mail. Basically, hey, what’s up? I got divorced, here’s where I’m living, hope you’re well. It was great because I didn’t have to worry about seeing people’s reactions or hear their comments. I could control the news and only tell those that I wanted to.
Don’t. No one is owed an update to your life story. You can choose to tell some people and not others. You can not talk about it at all ever and you never have to politely answer a question if you don’t want to.
No matter your communication strategy, know that you are in control of your narrative. What you say is powerful, so choose wisely. Try writing it out before you say anything. Feel free to play around with your wording and be confident that there is no wrong way of doing this.
